If you feel lost in your intimate relationships, or even in your life, the following content may be able to help you, but it requires some time for you to think. So, I invite you to slow down, give yourself some time, and be cautious of unconsciously brainwashing by fast-food culture!

First, let me share with you a video I watched today, in which the great spiritual mentor Krishnamurti said:

Who can tell you how to do it?

You see, when you were a child, your parents told you what to do, right?

This mentality is cultivated throughout your life. In school, you’re told what to do. In college, you’re told what to do.

Your entire life is like this.

Someone tells you what’s right and what’s wrong.

You should do this, you shouldn’t do that.

What does this mean? There’s no self-exploration.

You wouldn’t say you represent all of humanity, but in reality, you do.

Because every person, every human being, is suffering greatly—with great pain, anxiety, uncertainty, confusion, and insecurity.

Just like you, just like everyone else, we don’t accept this.

We think our pain is completely separate from that of others.

Similarly, we have this mindset that I can’t act on my own.

I must be told what to do.

From the highest authority to the poorest priest.

What does this paragraph mean?

Actually, it touched me deeply because I used to live unconsciously, living with various fears, never thinking about what I truly love, and how my life should be lived. Even in my intimate relationships, I faced them with the experiences I learned from others.

But this is my own life!

I must take responsibility for my own life, explore my possibilities, and realize these possibilities rather than living in fear, afraid of being hurt or unrecognized by others.

Love can solve all problems.

Start by loving yourself!

So, I invite you to start exploring yourself today, and follow the joy in your heart to become your true self.

Here, let me explain the difference between selfishness and self-love.

Selfishness means allowing only yourself to act a certain way, not allowing others to do the same.

Self-love means allowing yourself and others to act in a certain way.

Love is about tolerance and understanding, not contempt and hostility.

Being confident and loving yourself can solve many emotional problems, but many people are still struggling with why others don’t love them, and what they need to do for others to love them.

These questions only confuse you and slowly consume you.

Whether others love you or not is their business. Holding onto what others do will only make you suffer. Who else will suffer if not you?

First, take care of your own business and do things that make you happy.

If others love you, they will naturally love you. No need to constantly question and worry about it.

This reminds me of a saying by Steve Jobs in a speech, where he said that he asks himself a few questions every day, and one of them is: How would I spend today if it were the last day of my life?

This question is also for each of us. If today were the last day of your life, are the problems you are facing still problems? What do you most want to do?

Dear friends, you must be confident, love yourself, read more wise books, and less scattered articles, and don’t let disorganized opinions brainwash you.

I have always believed that everyone is their best psychologist, their best healer, emotional consultant, doctor, teacher, etc., because no one knows you better than yourself.

What you lack now is not wisdom, but the key to unlocking it.

This key might be a good book, a teacher, or a sentence—they all help open the doors to wisdom.

Life is about experience and creation!

You can read any book you want, go wherever you want, do whatever you want, but don’t be fixated on the outcome of a thing, just experience it and show yourself.

I know breaking up is painful, and having a bad relationship is painful. In fact, the reason for the pain is that things didn’t develop the way you wanted them to.

Things have happened, so let’s treat it as an exam. When you get the test paper, you can choose how to answer.

You can choose to be positive or negative, confident or doubtful.

Your life is yours to control, so ask yourself what you really want.

In an age where you won’t go hungry, what we ultimately seek is inner joy and peace.

But you’ve always had it, in your heart.

At this moment, you can choose joy and peace, so why do you need someone or something to feel joyful and peaceful? Why do you have to become rich to feel joyful and peaceful? Why do you need to be outstanding in order to feel joyful and peaceful?

The pursuit and attachment will make us overlook the beauty around us and lose ourselves.

Now, I invite you to calm down, stay with yourself, feel your feelings, replace your negative thoughts with positive ones, and then take action.

First, be confident and love yourself, then love others, help others become themselves, and encounter the unknown self.

Relationships help us see ourselves, not to keep someone.

These are some of the insights I have learned from counseling, and I hope they can help you see that you deserve to be loved and have the ability to love.

Let’s encourage each other!

Thank you for being there!